Written by Ben Slavin
Another week, another tie. The most anticlimactic thing ever seen in sports. Outside of the tie, we had some great games, some blowouts, and many storyline developments. A clear top-5 in the league is developing as the next tier have struggled greatly for consistency and while many of them could still win the Super Bowl, they’ve raised serious concerns.
After week 1, I tried not to overreact to a lot of the results since historically the week is full of anomalys. But if teams underperformed again, they will not get the same pass and tumble down the rankings. Similarly, if teams followed up a pleasantly surprising first week with another convincing performance, they will see that reflected in their rankings.
Once again, now that we’re into the season, teams will move up or down a lot based on trades, injuries, or big wins or losses. Who the opponent was, how close of a game it was, and just in general how good the team looked will be considered more than just getting the victory.
32. Buffalo Bills (0-2, Same)
The final score doesn’t give the Bills enough credit for how truly bad they are -- one of their players (Vontae Davis) was so frustrated he retired at halftime. A couple more weeks and we might be talking about a historically bad team.
Another week, another tie. The most anticlimactic thing ever seen in sports. Outside of the tie, we had some great games, some blowouts, and many storyline developments. A clear top-5 in the league is developing as the next tier have struggled greatly for consistency and while many of them could still win the Super Bowl, they’ve raised serious concerns.
After week 1, I tried not to overreact to a lot of the results since historically the week is full of anomalys. But if teams underperformed again, they will not get the same pass and tumble down the rankings. Similarly, if teams followed up a pleasantly surprising first week with another convincing performance, they will see that reflected in their rankings.
Once again, now that we’re into the season, teams will move up or down a lot based on trades, injuries, or big wins or losses. Who the opponent was, how close of a game it was, and just in general how good the team looked will be considered more than just getting the victory.
32. Buffalo Bills (0-2, Same)
The final score doesn’t give the Bills enough credit for how truly bad they are -- one of their players (Vontae Davis) was so frustrated he retired at halftime. A couple more weeks and we might be talking about a historically bad team.
31. Arizona Cardinals (0-2, Same)
You’ve got to give the Cardinals credit; they’re fighters. Not on the football field, of course, but they seem committed to making the race for the last spot in power rankings competitive.
30. Detroit Lions (0-2, Down 2)
On the bright side, the Lions didn’t seem to roll over against the 49ers like they did the week before and almost came back to win the game. However, the only reason they were able to attempt this comeback is that they looked so flat to start the game. Ignore the statline, Matt Stafford is not right.
On the bright side, the Lions didn’t seem to roll over against the 49ers like they did the week before and almost came back to win the game. However, the only reason they were able to attempt this comeback is that they looked so flat to start the game. Ignore the statline, Matt Stafford is not right.
29. Oakland Raiders (0-2, Down 2)
Just like last week, the Raiders started strong before fading in the second half. Since Denver is nowhere near the quality of opponent as the Rams, the Raiders still nearly snuck out with a win. They didn’t and Jon Gruden’s masterpiece falls to 0-2.
Just like last week, the Raiders started strong before fading in the second half. Since Denver is nowhere near the quality of opponent as the Rams, the Raiders still nearly snuck out with a win. They didn’t and Jon Gruden’s masterpiece falls to 0-2.
28. Seattle Seahawks (0-2, Down 4)
Seattle did not look good against the Bears. For the second straight week the offensive line allowed constant pressure and the defense was poor.
Seattle did not look good against the Bears. For the second straight week the offensive line allowed constant pressure and the defense was poor.
27. Indianapolis Colts (1-1, Up 3)
The story of the week in Indianapolis has to be the Colts defense, which did a great job shutting down Adrian Peterson after getting run all over last week by the Bengals. If they can keep this up, Andrew Luck will win them some games.
26. Denver Broncos (2-0, Down 3)
The Raiders are not a very good football team and the Broncos barely escaped a home game with a last-second win. That should tell you all you need to know about this team.
The Raiders are not a very good football team and the Broncos barely escaped a home game with a last-second win. That should tell you all you need to know about this team.
25. Houston Texans (0-2, Down 7)
That was pathetic. You get to play a team reeling after a storm game and multiple injuries and quite simply blow it. Deshaun Watson isn’t fully back yet, the defense isn’t special, and the coaching might even be part of the problem. Once Watson gets back, they’ll be fine, but digging themselves such a big hole is definitely not ideal.
That was pathetic. You get to play a team reeling after a storm game and multiple injuries and quite simply blow it. Deshaun Watson isn’t fully back yet, the defense isn’t special, and the coaching might even be part of the problem. Once Watson gets back, they’ll be fine, but digging themselves such a big hole is definitely not ideal.
24. Washington Redskins (1-1, Down 5)
The Redskins got down early and with Alex Smith leading your offense, you aren’t meant to play from behind. As a team that’s supposed to be dominant running the ball, the offensive line looked horrible and AD looked Almost Dead.
The Redskins got down early and with Alex Smith leading your offense, you aren’t meant to play from behind. As a team that’s supposed to be dominant running the ball, the offensive line looked horrible and AD looked Almost Dead.
23. New York Jets (1-1, Down 2)
So much for Sam Darnold, franchise savior. He very well might be that someday, but his two picks and inaccuracy cost the Jets the game sunday.
So much for Sam Darnold, franchise savior. He very well might be that someday, but his two picks and inaccuracy cost the Jets the game sunday.
22. Miami Dolphins (2-0, Up 4)
The Dolphins looked great in the first half, and then came alarmingly close to blowing the game. A better quarterback probably wins the Jets the game.
The Dolphins looked great in the first half, and then came alarmingly close to blowing the game. A better quarterback probably wins the Jets the game.
21. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-0, Up 8)
Journeyman Ryan Fitzpatrick is setting positive records; recent number one pick Jameis Winston isn’t allowed with the team and will likely return the backup. What a world we live in. Before you put the Bucs in the Super Bowl and Fitzmagic in the Hall of Fame, look at how bad the defense was again considering the Philadelphia offense. Nevertheless, enjoy this run while it lasts.
Journeyman Ryan Fitzpatrick is setting positive records; recent number one pick Jameis Winston isn’t allowed with the team and will likely return the backup. What a world we live in. Before you put the Bucs in the Super Bowl and Fitzmagic in the Hall of Fame, look at how bad the defense was again considering the Philadelphia offense. Nevertheless, enjoy this run while it lasts.
20. Cleveland Browns (0-1-1, Up 5)
A tie and a loss don’t make the Browns seem worthy of a rise on the surface. But. like I said, it’s how you look more than the result and the Browns hung in there with two teams fresh off trips to the divisional round. A better coach or kicker and maybe they’re 2-0 and the story of the league.
A tie and a loss don’t make the Browns seem worthy of a rise on the surface. But. like I said, it’s how you look more than the result and the Browns hung in there with two teams fresh off trips to the divisional round. A better coach or kicker and maybe they’re 2-0 and the story of the league.
19. Tennessee Titans (1-1, Up 1)
The Titans in no way deserved a win Sunday, but here we are. Being a good team doesn’t always mean you have to be the better team. Sometimes you just have to sit back and capitalize on the opportunities in front of you.
The Titans in no way deserved a win Sunday, but here we are. Being a good team doesn’t always mean you have to be the better team. Sometimes you just have to sit back and capitalize on the opportunities in front of you.
18. New York Giants (0-2, Down 2)
That was a game the Giants really should have won. Instead, they looked awful, with the defense allowing themselves two bad series that ended up digging the Giants too big of a hole. Eli Manning could barely get the ball out and when he could the entire plan was throw it to Saquon Barkley and hope he could break three tackles.
That was a game the Giants really should have won. Instead, they looked awful, with the defense allowing themselves two bad series that ended up digging the Giants too big of a hole. Eli Manning could barely get the ball out and when he could the entire plan was throw it to Saquon Barkley and hope he could break three tackles.
17. Cincinnati Bengals (2-0, Up 5)
The Bengals have earned this ranking and look like one of the more talented teams in the leagues. We’ve seen this all before, though, and it’s hard to trust Marvin Lewis to keep this team going the entire season.
The Bengals have earned this ranking and look like one of the more talented teams in the leagues. We’ve seen this all before, though, and it’s hard to trust Marvin Lewis to keep this team going the entire season.
16. San Francisco 49ers (1-1, Up 2)
Kyle Shanahan will be without versatile back Jerick McKinnon for the whole season and hasn’t even gotten to throw out his number one wideout yet. That hasn’t stopped the 49ers and the defense once again was a nice surprise.
Kyle Shanahan will be without versatile back Jerick McKinnon for the whole season and hasn’t even gotten to throw out his number one wideout yet. That hasn’t stopped the 49ers and the defense once again was a nice surprise.
15. Baltimore Ravens (1-1, Down 1)
Don’t worry too much about the poor performance against the Bengals because it has all the red flags possible. Division game? Check. Short week? Four is less than seven. Plus this is a talented Bengals team that has had the Ravens number recently.
Don’t worry too much about the poor performance against the Bengals because it has all the red flags possible. Division game? Check. Short week? Four is less than seven. Plus this is a talented Bengals team that has had the Ravens number recently.
14. Carolina Panthers (1-1, Down 2)
While the game may have been ugly, it was oddly encouraging. The Panthers were burned in ways atypical of this team (abysmal front seven play and an obscene amount of dropped balls) while the suspected weaknesses held up great. If the anomalys correct to the mean and the Panthers can keep up the strong offensive line and secondary play, they will be dangerous.
13. Dallas Cowboys (1-1, Same)
If the Cowboys can extrapolate their first two offensive drives against the Giants over the full season, they can be great. After that, the offense bogged down to the same unit that was nearly shut out last week and had to be bailed out by the defense once again.
If the Cowboys can extrapolate their first two offensive drives against the Giants over the full season, they can be great. After that, the offense bogged down to the same unit that was nearly shut out last week and had to be bailed out by the defense once again.
12. New Orleans Saints (1-1, Down 6)
It’s time to punish the Saints for how they’ve looked the first two weeks. If the Browns had a kicker, New Orleans would likely be 0-2 after embarrassing defeats to teams with a combined 5 wins last year.
It’s time to punish the Saints for how they’ve looked the first two weeks. If the Browns had a kicker, New Orleans would likely be 0-2 after embarrassing defeats to teams with a combined 5 wins last year.
11. Chicago Bears (1-1, Same)
While I think over the course of the season he will develop into a good quarterback, for the time being, Mitch Trubisky really scares me. It seems for every great throw he has there’s two boneheaded plays. The defense has been lights-out, though, so it doesn’t matter how bad Trubisky is for now.
While I think over the course of the season he will develop into a good quarterback, for the time being, Mitch Trubisky really scares me. It seems for every great throw he has there’s two boneheaded plays. The defense has been lights-out, though, so it doesn’t matter how bad Trubisky is for now.
10. Pittsburgh Steelers (0-1-1, Down 2)
The Steelers have been underwhelming over the first two weeks. They also played two of the most improved teams from last year it appears, so it’s hard to tell. The real trouble is the reports coming out over the last couple days that coach Mike Tomlin has lost the team while Antonio Brown isn’t showing up and wants a trade.
The Steelers have been underwhelming over the first two weeks. They also played two of the most improved teams from last year it appears, so it’s hard to tell. The real trouble is the reports coming out over the last couple days that coach Mike Tomlin has lost the team while Antonio Brown isn’t showing up and wants a trade.
9. Green Bay Packers (1-0-1, Up 1)
Two of the best defenses in football, one leg. Not a very catchy book title, but it should be used nonetheless because Aaron Rodgers is magical. The defense came to play sunday as well.
Two of the best defenses in football, one leg. Not a very catchy book title, but it should be used nonetheless because Aaron Rodgers is magical. The defense came to play sunday as well.
8. Kansas City Chiefs (2-0, Up 8)
Slotting the Chiefs directly after the two teams they just beat might seem like a form of cruel and unusual punishment, but I need one more week to be sold and I would still expect both those teams to beat Kansas City in a playoff rematch. And pencil in Patrick Mahomes on the MVP trophy while your at it because no quarterback gets to see the Chiefs defense 16 times.
Slotting the Chiefs directly after the two teams they just beat might seem like a form of cruel and unusual punishment, but I need one more week to be sold and I would still expect both those teams to beat Kansas City in a playoff rematch. And pencil in Patrick Mahomes on the MVP trophy while your at it because no quarterback gets to see the Chiefs defense 16 times.
7. Los Angeles Chargers (1-1, Up 2)
Once again, while the Chargers looked dominant on Sunday, the Bills qualifier has to be put into effect. Hopefully the Chargers are able until Joey Bosa comes back in October because their lack of a second star pass-rusher could cripple them like it did against Kansas City.
Once again, while the Chargers looked dominant on Sunday, the Bills qualifier has to be put into effect. Hopefully the Chargers are able until Joey Bosa comes back in October because their lack of a second star pass-rusher could cripple them like it did against Kansas City.
6. Atlanta Falcons (1-1, Up 1)
After putting two of their best defensive players on injury reserve and embarassing themselves in the season opener, the Falcons came out on aggressive against a division opponent and got a big win. It’s tough to tell if the success will last as once again they struggled to find creative ways to get Julio Jones the ball.
After putting two of their best defensive players on injury reserve and embarassing themselves in the season opener, the Falcons came out on aggressive against a division opponent and got a big win. It’s tough to tell if the success will last as once again they struggled to find creative ways to get Julio Jones the ball.
5. Philadelphia Eagles (1-1, Down 4)
The Eagles were the most recent victim of the unstoppable Fitzmagic train. They did not look great on either side of the ball and drop from the top spot. Help is on the way, though, with Carson Wentz potentially set to return next week and save the team.
The Eagles were the most recent victim of the unstoppable Fitzmagic train. They did not look great on either side of the ball and drop from the top spot. Help is on the way, though, with Carson Wentz potentially set to return next week and save the team.
4. New England Patriots (1-1, Up 1)
The Patriots lost a tough game against arguably the most talented team in the league and it’s tough to fault them too hard for it. The Patriots must have noticed they weren’t able to compete talent-wise with the top teams in the league because on Monday they acquired the biggest boom-or-bust player in the league in Josh Gordon. We could be looking at another Randy Moss-type career revival, or Gordon could be out of the league next year.
The Patriots lost a tough game against arguably the most talented team in the league and it’s tough to fault them too hard for it. The Patriots must have noticed they weren’t able to compete talent-wise with the top teams in the league because on Monday they acquired the biggest boom-or-bust player in the league in Josh Gordon. We could be looking at another Randy Moss-type career revival, or Gordon could be out of the league next year.
3. Jacksonville Jaguars (2-0, Up 1)
The AFC championship rematch was eerily similar to the original, but this time the Jaguars were able to hang on and they looked great doing so. If they can beat their biggest conference competition without Leonard Fournette and with a starting offensive linemen getting injured in the game, the Super Bowl is well within reach.
The AFC championship rematch was eerily similar to the original, but this time the Jaguars were able to hang on and they looked great doing so. If they can beat their biggest conference competition without Leonard Fournette and with a starting offensive linemen getting injured in the game, the Super Bowl is well within reach.
2. Minnesota Vikings (1-0-1. Up 1)
The Vikings could have won the game sunday quite easily if they just had a kicker. Instead, Daniel Carlson missed three kicks makeable for the average kicker and the Vikings are now one of four teams with a one in the third record column.
The Vikings could have won the game sunday quite easily if they just had a kicker. Instead, Daniel Carlson missed three kicks makeable for the average kicker and the Vikings are now one of four teams with a one in the third record column.
1. Los Angeles Rams (2-0. Up 1)
Over their last three halves, the Rams have essentially played with their food and just dominated two teams that come nowhere close to matching them in talent. Even though it’s tough to fully judge this team until they go up against a strong opponent, L.A. has more than earned the number one spot.
Think your team is ranked too low? Or just in general think I know nothing about football? Go crazy in the comments.
Works Cited
Easterling, Luke. “'Fitz-Magic' Continues as Bucs Hold off Eagles, 27-21.” USA Today, Gannett Satellite Information Network, 16 Sept. 2018, bucswire.usatoday.com/2018/09/16/bucs-eagles-nfl-week-2-game-recap/.
Over their last three halves, the Rams have essentially played with their food and just dominated two teams that come nowhere close to matching them in talent. Even though it’s tough to fully judge this team until they go up against a strong opponent, L.A. has more than earned the number one spot.
Think your team is ranked too low? Or just in general think I know nothing about football? Go crazy in the comments.
Works Cited
Easterling, Luke. “'Fitz-Magic' Continues as Bucs Hold off Eagles, 27-21.” USA Today, Gannett Satellite Information Network, 16 Sept. 2018, bucswire.usatoday.com/2018/09/16/bucs-eagles-nfl-week-2-game-recap/.
Jets are ass and should be at 32
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